I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
barbara walters just said penis...
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Randomize
