moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
Randomize
