the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
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