So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
