I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Randomize
