some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
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