belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
I woke up in a strange girl's bed and rifled through her mail to get her name.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
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