Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
Randomize
