i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
Last night when I was hammered I set a reminder to tell you that your boobs are my favorite ones in the world, so this is me giving you that message.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Randomize
