Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
