we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
Randomize
