it's too hot outside to masturbate.
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
she peed on how many people?
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
Randomize
