I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
Randomize
