Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
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