Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Randomize
