3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
Randomize
