I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
soo... how was my night?
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
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