Last night I had a dream we played Uno and had sex. You won at Uno, but you lost at sex.
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize
