I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
I have peed in a lot of sinks
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
