5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
my vag is so smooth its legendary
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
You did what with his pubic hair?
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