okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
we can add 'stealing hydrangeas from the sign in front of the credit union because we're too poor to have all of the flower arrangements professionally done' to my list of maybe-felonies
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
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