Im at strip club and am horny
true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize
