I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
Randomize
