one two three fourrrrnication!
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
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