Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
Randomize
