Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
Randomize