Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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