I'm lost and stupid without you.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
you inspire me to be a worse person
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
Hey this is your roommate. You know the one that let you have sex with her while you called out your exs name and cried?
I have no recollection of that. You must have the wrong number. P.s. your thongs still on the ceiling fan.
Randomize
