I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
Did you ever notice that cashews look like fetuses?
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize