? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
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