Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
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