Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Randomize
