You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
Randomize
