we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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