their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Randomize
