i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Randomize
