I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
I party with great urgency now.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
