I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
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