It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
