Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
So my grandma sent me a valentines day present of waterproof mascara, tissues, and chocolate. Way to reinforce that I'll be single and depressed on valentines day. Thanks grandma.
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
Randomize
