Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
i will never coherently bang her
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
vagina is talking i cant
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
Randomize
