okay pat passed out under dana's car
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
My dad is sitting where you rode me
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