I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
