you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
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