Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
I just forgot I was standing up.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
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