Midget sex pt 2 tonight
Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Randomize
