these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Just puked most of my soul out..
Randomize
