why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
Thank god for federal credentials. Waaaaayyyy to hungover to go through airport security lines right now.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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