lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
Randomize