That's intense
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
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