this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
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